Posted on June 6, 2016
Why should we be destined to be good at one thing and one thing only?
What’s up with the constant categorization of human’s, into little boxes that carefully label us neatly and succinctly in “Ten words or less”. We’re humans, not robots. That’s not what I’m about and I know that’s definitely not what you’re about! You’re not definable by a few words.
Think about how everything tends to be categorized. Whether it be someone’s career or lack thereof, their parental status, their health.. or the big one, an entire generation generalization.
I think we all know that you can’t put a couple of thousand people who are all the same age into a room, and expect them to have the same values and ethics. Yet I keep hearing about generations being classed as one big thing.
I decided to make a quick generalization of one “good” and one “bad” trait that the internet characterizes each generation. (Thank you Google!)
Gen X – Selfish/Hardworking
Millenials/Gen Y – Clueless/Self Reliant
Gen Z – Lost/Tech Savvy
Baby Boomers – Spoilt/World Revolutionaries
The Pioneers/Silent Generation – Out of touch/Self sacrificing
How can an entire generation of human beings that span across decades be whittle down to a couple of words? Just like star signs, there’s little merit to lumping people into a set of generalisations that have both negatives and positives. As if somehow these words can placate us and make us believe that someone else is to blame for the problems of the world, that the last generation was, or the next generation is, or that the future generation will be responsible.
At least that’s what the fast-food news channels want you to think. But we know better don’t we.
I don’t believe in these segregations (just like any segregation in life!) It serves no purpose to separate ourselves from our parents, grandparents, children, grandchildren.. We are all the same, we’re all human and we’re all trying to figure it out, what we’re good at, what we love, what we want to do, what makes us happy, what makes others happy.
What I mean is we’re all experiencing this rapidly changing and advancing world from different perspectives. Which is a good thing. If we all had the same perspective there wouldn’t be innovation. I can guarantee you that Elon Musk doesn’t view the world the same as I do, I can also guarantee you that my closest friends all have different views on the world. That’s what makes humans cool!
We’ve all had to adapt and grow up in our own different ways. Think about how skilled we all are in different things. Sure there are specialists in work, but they’re not just that one person. They might also be a mum or dad, they might be an avid sports person, they might be a complete foodie…
Gone are the days of being “good” at one thing and one thing only. We have the luxury of exploring our options and getting good at a whole lot of things.
We seem to have forgotten that we’ve all amassed and mastered many skills of modern day living.
I look to my friends and family every time I write a blog post. Some of them are creatives, some are intellectuals, but above all, they are all renaissance people.
No more pigeon-holing and typecasting into one thing and one thing only. There’s more to us than just one facet.
All photography by Louis Lay. www.louislay.com Instagram: @louislay
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Posted on April 11, 2016
Who told you, when you’re standing in front of a mirror staring at yourself, to hate yourself?
Was it the lack of likes on instagram, was it the fitness model in a magazine who said skinny is gross and that fit looks better naked. was it the “curves are better, and REAL women have curves” post. Was it the millions of other things in the media that tell us to love ourselves, but also to be skinnier, curvier, fitter, longer hair, shorter hair, better clothes, be more green, etc
In a world where we’re taught to stand out, be a bloody individual and go against the grain, We’re beginning to look and awful lot like a carbon copied, instagram filtered, facetuned clones of each other.
Sure we have different hair colour (but always ombre’d to perfection, or with the “colour du jour” in rainbow streaks) like every other girl.
In a world where we have one size fits all, but if you don’t fit the size, then you don’t fit in.
A world where we’re told to be skinny, but not too skinny or we’ll be told to eat a burger, where we’re told to be fit, because we won’t look as good naked, but not to be too fit because that’s “gross” and emasculating to men. Where we’re told to be curvy because curves are sexier than a little boys body on a girl.
We’re told that blue eyes are better than brown, that green eyes are deeper than blue, that brown are warmer than the others. We’re told that being asian we’re meant to be demure and yet somehow a nikita ninja at the same time. That an asian woman should definitely only date white men… because, babies.
We’re told that black women are meant to be sassy and great dancers, bootylicious and all that. But god forbid if they have “out of control” hair, or are more adept at being introverted.
We’re told that lesbians are these crazy jacked up, butch type women who are man haters.
We’re told that curvy women are better lovers, so long as they still fit into the hour glass shape, so long as they are confident and vavavoom and all that jazz.
We’re told that if you don’t fit the clothing, then you don’t fit the world.
How dare a product that I am paying for, make me feel like I don’t fit it? How dare a company create insecurities that were never there and never meant to be there.
You want to know why they do it?
Because of money.
We are told that perfection is attainable, if only we buy this product, use this cream, and follow this diet in a book that costs 29.99 (plus postage and handling)
The aspirational women in the magazines, the career women who have babies, families, jobs and the perfect wardrobe. All of this can be yours for a price tag. Just work a little harder. You too can look like the girls on instagram, you too can be as perfect and happy as they are.
When did we move away from selfless into selfish? When did we celebrate others for their non-achievments? Celebrating celebrities for having sex and filming it. For getting married and annulling it the next day, for saying outrageously stupid things that make the entire human race cringe, for getting naked and “daring to bare” for the 400th time on instagram.
There are so many irrelevant things that we make relevant.
The media forces them upon us, they make us go crazy for these things, pressuring us to eat every sugary filled piece of crap.
It’s there to deceive us into thinking that it inspires us, to pray to false idols, women who are neither empowering nor contributing anything to this world.
So I dare you as a human, to shut out the noise, not become a slave to expensive marketing tricks, and love things that you truly love.
It’s everywhere in the real world, from taking in beautiful scenery, to spending time with family and friends. Getting dressed up to go out with friends, and not stressing that your outfit is current or expensive enough. Being happy with being the awesome person that you are.
That’s all I ask.
p.s I hope you enjoy my cover of 21 pilots, stressed out. I feel the lyrics are indicative of what I’m trying to get across in this blog post
All photography by Louis LayLeave a Comment
Posted on February 20, 2016
A recent shoot I did just became published at Beauty Scene (Make sure to click the link to check it out in Hi-res glory!)
So I thought I would share the incredible shots with you here!
The photographer, Veronica Formos hails from Russia but has made her home here in Canada.
Her style of photography is both whimsical and sharply beautiful.
The MUA Carole, (Instagram: @caroletheartist) also recently moved to Vancouver, so we were a pretty international crew!
Tell me what you think in the comments box below!
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Posted on February 10, 2016
With valentines day just around the corner I thought a post on fun (and sometimes free) activities are would be a good idea.
Having lived in many cities and countries, it can sometimes get overwhelming trying to find new things to do. Whether it’s with your partner or a group of friends, there’s always plenty to do, you just have to explore and find out.
But if you’re stuck for ideas, here’s a few suggestions. If you have any great ideas, please feel free to comment in the comment box below!
Shall we play some music?
Or go for a dance?
Or explore the city and take some photo’s?
*All photo’s from Cosmopolitan Magazine, Singapore
Posted on February 1, 2016
Having moved to yet another city in yet another country, I decided to make this place a little more of a home than just a another travel stop.
My partner and I scoured through Ikea, local art fairs, markets and art stores, all in pursuit for the perfect things to fill our temporary home. The emphasis was on being affordable. After all, most of this stuff is either going to be sold, or has a good chance of getting broken when we move again.
I had my heart set on gold tones. Yep expensive and impossible to find in most decor stores, I’m fun like that.
Needless to say, my boyfriend set the budget limits and left me to my own devices. I couldn’t find anything that I wanted for our price range, so I came to the conclusion that I was going to do my own home made art.
In particular, I wanted something that represented the both of us (he comes from all over the world, and I was born in Australia but have also lived all over)
So I set about creating a world map made of gold and black paints.
Here is my DIY Tutorial, so you can make your own if you want!
A word of warning, it took approx 11 hours to make (drying time, printing, cutting, painting all included.) I nearly went cross eyed by the end, but I think you will enjoy the end product as much as I do!
What you will need:
Canvas size of your choosing
Background acrylic paint colour (I chose black)
“World” paint colours (You can either do multi colours, or stick to one colour like I did)
Imitation gold leaf (If you’re doing metallic like me make sure you get at least 100 10x10cm sheets, I ran out!)
Soft sponge brush
Patience and a good mix tape for music inspiration
Print out a world map (I used this one here, and blew it up to a huge size, to print out over approx 10 A4 sheets of paper)
I stuck the sheets together with painter’s tape, and then place a large plastic sheet over the top (I bought a shower curtain from my local dollar store and cut it up to be larger than the canvas)
I then traced the map below, onto the shower curtain.
I took the plastic off the board, and placed it on a cutting board. I then took a few hours to painstakingly cut the traced world out of the plastic. leaving only the outline. (It might have been easier and quicker with a sharper knife!!)
Paint your entire canvas the desired background colour you want. I chose black, and did several coats to make sure it was on thick.
Once the paint has dried completely, place your plastic sheet over the top.
Carefully paint the parts that are exposed by the plastic. Be careful not to let any paint seep through the edges of the plastic. You can definitely paint over the plastic though (You’ll get a sharp edge, and you can peel the plastic back easily once the paint has dried)
After that, place the gold leaf on top of the painted area. (Skip this step if you don’t want a metallic look)
I suggested sticking to one continent at a time, that way you can work without the paint drying. However I didn’t know this before I started, so that’s when I used the clear lacquer for the gold leafing to adhere to. That way if I accidentally painted over any gold leaf, it wouldn’t show up, and I wouldn’t have to use more (expensive) leafing, to cover up the mistakes!
Once you have finished, wait for the paint and leafing to completely dry.
Suggestions to pass that time. Dance, go to karaoke, or bake a cake for your neighbour
When it’s dry, carefully peel back the plastic sheet (Try not to tear it, you can use that world cutout for future projects!)
Make sure there aren’t any spots missing, Paint in the smaller islands like Hawaii, Fiji etc, by hand.
Hang, and admire!
If you create one, please feel free to share it on the more than just models Facebook page! I would love to see your creativity!!
Posted on January 14, 2016
In the wonderful words of Australian singer/songwriter Matt Corby: You’ll be my resolution.
No. Matt is not going to be my resolution.
Rather, this year focus is my resolution.
Focus on standing very still…
Have you ever felt overwhelmed with the sheer amount of things that need and want to be done?
If you haven’t, then you’re most likely still in school. ENJOY IT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!
This is not your typical “My new years eve resolution was…”
Technology, social media, the world in general.. it was all meant to make things easier, faster, nicer. Instead it’s made it harder, more enviable at our neighbour’s seeming success in 5 different genres and accountable at all hours.
Firstly, if you’ve read any of my past posts, you would know that social media is one big facade of amazingness. No one can possibly get all the things done that they’re doing in one day. They either have help from a team of makeup artists, lighting crew, photographers, PA’s, free clothes, free food, free anything else you can think of.
OR, they’re posting stuff that’s been archived for slow days, when they’re sitting around in their pyjamas . (which is perfectly fine too!)
But this year, instead of breaking my back trying to do everything at once, I’m going to streamline my focus on each individual thing I want to achieve. Sure I may have two or three projects going at once. But each will have its own place and time.
No more jumping from thing to thing, and losing flow.
There’s a lot I want to get done this year, but not having a plan will be a sure fire way to make some of them fail. Instead I’ve set goals, and mini goals within them. Timelines (flexible, because there is life of course!) and a round about way I am going to try and achieve them.
So let’s hope and work on our own goals, while enjoying life and each other!
That’s it. My resolution.
Oh and one more thing… I want to get fit….
Posted on November 5, 2015
I think that we should share things that we’re passionate about. Not just the same news articles that everyone is sharing and self promotion.
There’s so much more than yet another selfie, or another sleeping kitten video that’s gone viral.
(Not that there’s anything wrong with either. ok perhaps the former has beginnings of narcism.)
However, there’s so much more to us than just facades of fantasticalness. Share what you love, share things that you have knowledge on.
Some of my friends share the most incredible things that I never would have recognised. From architecture, history, music, dance, makeup, politics, environment, health, sports, food, human rights… The list could go on forever.
Things I love: Piano’s that resemble Louboutins. Because piano’s and fashion are always a yes.
I like to think of my Facebook newsfeed as a carefully curated selection of interesting updates and shares.
and the writers/contributers are my friends and pages I follow.
I’m not saying that I get all of my worldly information from Facebook (because that would just be crazy! like using wikipedia as a legitimate source of knowledge… please I repeat do not use wikipedia for your studies!)
Here’s a little food for thought. I absolutely abhor click-bait titles.
If you’re not interested in an article unless it says “I can’t believe what happened next…” or “Number 15 had me gasping with shock.”
Then you must have the attention span of a 5 year old. No maybe a 3 year old. I know some 5 year olds that wouldn’t fall for that shit.
Ok there I said it. Sorry if I’ve offended you. (But not really sorry, because obviously I edit my posts and I decided to leave this in.)
Things I love, part 2: Mountains. Please know that I love each and every one of my friend’s scenery pics. Yes keep showing me all the cool places you are!
OK now that that’s out of the way, let’s get onto cool shit that you should be sharing as a service to your fellow peers and friends.
#1. Stuff you’re really into. (Food? Everyone likes food. Or how about travelling? Ummm, fashion is nice! animals? see kitten video reference above…)
#2. causes that are close to your heart. and there might be a million of them, but hey share them. I’m interested!
#3. Cool stuff you’ve been up to. It’s all about the little victories. I like seeing my friends doing happy and cool stuff.
#4. Your honest opinion of a movie/album/band/concert review.
So much better than trusting the 17 year old intern who writes for the shitty music/film blog.
#5. Whatever the hell you want. because it’s your page and your digital medium to convey whatever message or non-message you want!
#6. Promoting friends/family with their careers/achievements. That’s cool. You care, I care. We all care.
#7. things you need help/opinions with. If you’re struggling let your friends know. I know I want to know and help. If you need an answer to something someone unexpected might know it. If you need a rare record from 1876 then someone might just have it (You see I made a bad music joke there, because records weren’t invented until 1877… nerd moment for me.)
#8. And this one is possibly the most important one. Never ever post or share anything Kardashian related. Don’t be a slave, don’t baa like the media wants you to. Just so much no. Sorry there is absolutely no love for the K-Klan and what diet they are or aren’t on, or what person they’re “dating”.
Ok this post wasn’t as succinct or eloquent as I would have liked, but can you blame me?
Today alone I’ve written a press bio for a friend and then spent the last 8 hours
procrastinating writing my fiction novel. (Oh yeah. that’s happening! It’s all sci-fi, music, glamorous settings and cool people and… well you’ll just have to buy a copy when I put it on amazon for $1.99 won’t you… just kidding. If you’re a friend I’ll probably end up posting half of it on my Facebook. Or if you cook me a nice a meal I’ll totally read it to you in all the character’s voices.)
Things I love part 3. Sir Hamlet. This is my hamster looking like a bat. I proceeded to laugh for the entire day, and called him a bat for the rest of the week… Anyone want to be friends with me?Leave a Comment
Posted on September 10, 2015
It’s international are you OK day today,
Originally I had planned to write a post about my experience shopping and buying completely sustainable and ethical clothing for a month. But that can wait.
Am I beautiful? Why doesn’t he/she love me? Why can’t I make friends? What is anxiety? Why am I so alone? Why am I such a failure?
These are a few of the very extensive list of “Why/how/Am I” questions that are asked on search engines, from all over the world.
It’s a pretty depressing list, but you know what’s even worse? They’re being asked to an inanimate search engine, that doesn’t have any empathy (or usually the right answers either!)
I’ve had my share of “Am I?” and “Why” questions, about myself before. I’ve also been one of the people googling late at night, to find the answers on my own, whether it be because of embarrassment at having such “silly/negative” questions, or because I don’t know how/who to ask.
Lucky for me, I have an awesome family and friendship network, all of who are attentive and notice when me, or anyone else is feeling off.
If you’ve been reading my blog posts before, then you’ll know the stance (read, love hate relationship) that I have with social media. On the one hand it’s an amazing way to stay connected, and find out things about friends and the world that you never knew before.
On the other very heavy hand, its an invasion of privacy, with trolls coming into the safety of your home, and getting under your skin, while they write from their computer somewhere else in the world.
It’s a way to make you feel bad about yourself, forgetting that the instagram gallery of “amazing lives” is a snapshot in time, usually not even taken on the same day of posting.
Yep, family and friends, it doesn’t get much better than this!
Everyone has their insecure days. Yes, even the most confident people do.
For some it’s easier to talk through the inner dialogue, to quash the rising fears, and to get back to living and being awesome.
For others there’s a lot more going on underneath. The inner turmoil that’s hidden beneath a happy facade.
I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been modelling for so many years, we’re taught how to fake a genuine smile. There’s an oxymoron for you. Fake a genuine smile.
It’s simple really.
Step 1: Think of something incredible in your life, adorable animals, presents on christmas day, your significant other, family.. whatever it is.
Step 2: think of said noun, doing something funny.
Step 3: Pose, and hold that smile.
It’s a job, that smile has to be held for a few minutes or even a few hours, but that’s it. Once the job is done (and your cheeks are sufficiently sore from grinning too much) you get to go home.
Now imagine having to keep up a fake smile like that every day, even when you feel horrible inside, when all these damaging thoughts are attacking you.
If you have no idea what I’m talking about, then that’s absolutely awesome and I’m super glad that you have a great headspace! But please keep reading, cos we need you too! If what I’m writing has you nodding with familiarity, then also keep reading!
1. Know that it gets better.
It really does. I’m not pulling your leg, I’m not making things up, or spouting some bs line for you.
Know that you are incredible. I like you. Yep I think you’re an amazing human being, and there’s not enough positivity on the internet, and a whole lot of negativity towards strangers and friends alike.
So at the risk of sounding cray cray, You’re totally awesome, incredible, talented, beautiful and marvellous!
2. Try talking to people. Family is an obvious one here, they’re usually the people closest to you and with your best interests at heart. Friends are also great, however it’s sometimes a little harder if they don’t know the full story, or aren’t properly trained to deal with issues. But by all means talk!
And of course psychologists, school counsellors, peer helpers (maybe my school was the only one to do this? It’s an incredible program where they trained up several students from different social groups, in how to deal with any issue that another student might be having. I was one of the peer helpers, and we had a school counsellor checking in with us every few weeks to make sure we were ok in dealing with students’ issues. But the amazing thing about it was that most of the people I had coming to me, were from different social groups. and I assume my own group of friends perhaps went to another peer helper. That way any issues that might have been happening inter-friendship group, could be taken to an outside party. It was honestly one of the best things to come to my school, and I think every school should have it!)
3. If people are too hard, talk to an animal (patting fluffy ones are very awesome, but any animal will work).
4. If those two options are too hard, write a diary and read over your thoughts when you’re in a slightly better frame of mind later on. Reflection helps! (then move to step 3 and then step 2.)
5. Sometimes a social media cleanse can help, especially if you have feelings of inadequacy due to the flooding of “Amazing” lives. (Who wouldn’t!)
6. Do the things you love, go and paint, write music, dance, pick flowers, watch tv…
It’s so easy to say “don’t feel alone in this” when the number one feeling is probably loneliness.
My favourite muffin to hug!
As a friend/family member, watching this happen to someone you know and love can be completely heart breaking. I’m sure there’s plenty of times you’ve wanted to say “Snap out of it. C’mon be happy, you’re amazing, can’t you see that?”
And wouldn’t that be incredible if that was all there was to it. Oh wow, that really would make life happier and sparklier.
Sometimes it’s not always about a single underlying problem. Sometimes there might not even be a problem, and that can make it feel so much worse that there’s nothing to pinpoint.
Know that you’re not always going to deal with someone elses’ pain/questions/sadness in the right way, and that’s ok! You’re human too!
I know I certainly haven’t been tactful at times, or said/done the right thing.
All I know is that we can draw from our experiences. whether it be good/bad or everything in between, we’re all on this earth, navigating our own strange journey, only now we’re being bombarded with a constant reminder that we should be all these things we’re not yet, or that we’re not pretty enough, strong enough, skinny enough, kind enough, caring enough, extroverted enough, ladylike enough, quiet enough, accomplished enough.
Well you know what I have to say to that.
You are enough.
You always have been, and you always will be.
If you’re in Canada, and need someone to talk to, try these:
*You can email, live chat, or phonecall them
Posted on August 23, 2015
This morning I woke up and like every morning before that I checked messages and emails.
It’s become kind of a ritual, before I have my breakfast smoothie, or roll out of bed, I switch on my phone to see what’s been happening on the other side of the world whilst I was sleeping.
(A nomadic life hazard of having family and friends in many different time zones.)
I’m guessing that like most of my female readers (and men too!), I have subscriptions to one or two magazines/fashion brands/pinterest boards…
Ok full confession, I am subscribed to pretty much every great fashion magazine and blog out there. I like to keep up to date with what’s trending, what issues are important to our generation, what the fashion world is doing and everything else that comes with it.
The first two articles on my ELLE email, all things I would expect to see in Elle.
I’d like to think that I’m selective with what comes into my inbox. I avoid the gossip rags at all costs, not wanting to read the drivel they make up produce.
So you can imagine my disappointment when I opened my inbox this morning and practically every single article was about the Kardashian (and whatever other surnames they fall under) peoples.
I’m not even joking, the next 3 articles when I scrolled down, were these 3…
One article, I could understand, but THREE articles on them? Come on, seriously does no one else on earth exist anymore? How does a child end up in a fashion mag? This was not a mothers and baby magazine, not a maternity magazine and not a gossip magazine…
So I started doing my research, I read the mission statements of each magazine (picture below), I thought that maybe I had gotten it wrong, that I was expecting too much from the editors. However when I read the statements, they were clearly saying one thing and doing the exact opposite. The articles they are pushing are neither empowering, intelligent or aspirational.
Elle and Harpers Bazaar (Respectively) mission statements taken from their media presskits (23 August 2015)
As a model, I understand the importance of fashion, presentation and knowing how to dress your best. I love the artistic expression behind new makeup trends, seeing backstage photographs of models preparing for the runway, fashion designers stories of their inspiration for their latest season. Of course I’m hyperaware that unfortunately the kardashians are very sadly part of the current pop-culture. Yet the fact that this one family is a constant feature of articles from supposed educated writers and fashion journalists, is disheartening.
I’m sure the writers roll their eyes at every assignment they have to write about the “clan”. Is it really the masses who are driving this demand?
I would like to believe that it isn’t. My social circles have their focus on things far more interesting than mundane material on absolute strangers’ lives.
So then who is behind this massive push of these 5 or 6 people (I’m not completely sure how many there are in the family/group, I feel like they keep multiplying and there are more and more each time!)
The header, taken from Elle’s online US site. The Kardashians featured in 3 of the 5 options…
I’m not expecting nobel prize writing or articles, but I do expect a certain standard. Fashion is more than just the same bandage dress in every shade, it’s more than the same 4 girls who are given everything by designers.
I want to know about fashion on the streets, affordable fashion, sustainable fashion, haute couture, celebrities, monarchies, designer from other countries, up and coming student designers… Oh the list could go on and on.
But instead we’re subjected to the same women/girls doing the same thing, wearing the same clothes, and posting the same instagram pictures with the same pout, same lack of clothing, and same designers that stock their wardrobes for them.
On the subject of transgender, I’m delighted that fashion and culture magazines are covering this topic. It’s incredible. But seriously it’s as if there is only one transgender person in this entire world…
The one person that they constantly interview and bestow praise on (highlighting how tough it has been), is starting to grow a little tiring. Sorry. I said it.
Reality shows, high end fashion labels, countless interviews, and bundles of money can’t be the average struggles of the transgender community.
There has to be so many more interesting, intelligent and articulate transgender people out there who could shed a much better light on the issues they are facing and what changes need to be made in our social system.
Two articles about pregnancy and babies. I can’t stress enough that this is coming from a high end fashion magazine for women, not babies… and look, another one of them popped up! seriously how many of them are there? Make it stop!!
The general public is interested in so much more than just one family. But the media world is intent on throwing them in our faces, with every boring little detail. Things that aren’t relevant, things that don’t belong in high end fashion magazines. Things that do belong in gossip rags, weekly “news” on celebrities.
I wish that these high end magazines would instead present us with the amazing fashions of other people. The lives of other artists, musicians, businesswomen and those who are making an impact in the world.
I don’t know about you, but I want to see how powerful smart and intelligent women dress. Not just one single family that seems to have a strong hold over the media.
American magazines, take note of your European counterparts. They may still have one or two articles on them, but they cover much more of the real fashion world, relevant culture and news topics that are of interest to people everywhere.
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Posted on June 18, 2015
Lately I’ve been hearing it everywhere. They/you/he/she is too: fat, skinny, ugly, neat, pretty, kind, assertive, stupid, feminist, bold, quiet…
The list could go on.
It’s as if the adverb “too” is now there solely to make the following verb a negative.
Think about it. If someone says “She’s too fat.” It’s still the same jibe as “She’s too skinny.” Even saying “She’s too healthy.” doesn’t come off as a positive thing. (Is there any such thing as too healthy or too happy?)
Not caring what anyone else is doing, I’m focusing on being as happy and healthy as possible!
I am just as guilty of doing this, as much as the next person. What prompted me to think about it was when I realized how negatively it was to view things this way.
I was watching an interview with a celebrity, and as she was talking I kept thinking “She seems to friendly, it’s coming off as a bit fake.”
Then I stopped. Wow, did I really just think that? Who was I to dictate how someone else should act. Did I know her personally? Nope! Was it affecting me directly? Nope!
Why am I concerned with the way someone else is acting/looking/simply being, if it’s neither harmful nor affecting my life!
She is a talented actress who should have more of the focus on her craft and skills rather than the intense scrutiny she gets on the way she conducts interviews or the way she appears.
She looked happy in that interview, they were talking about her latest film, the places she had visited and other interesting facts about her life.
And yet I’m sure that a majority of the thousands of people who had watched it, were probably making mental judgements on what she was wearing, what her body looked like and whether she fit their ideal of happiness and social presence.
Don’t judge me, I promise not to judge you
Why is that so important to us? Admittedly appearance is a huge part of being human. We are visual creatures. But tell me have you ever seen a child wearing tattered and muddy clothing, so unabashedly happy? I used to be that kid, who didn’t care what I was wearing, how I looked. I cared more about being happy and making the people around me happy.
We need to move back to being those kids who don’t care if someone else is a little weird, hyper, quiet, messy, clean… Yes you can still take pride in the way you look. You can conduct yourself with the decorum that you deem right There is absolutely nothing wrong with that (especially if it makes you happy!)
But we need to stop pushing our ideals onto everyone else. We are not the parents of the world, we are all navigating our own paths.
So make a promise to yourself today to focus on your achievements and goals, work hard to help your friends and family achieve theirs. Forget about the little things that annoy you, forget about judging someone else’s journey, and take delight in the happiness of others!
Four shots and I couldn’t figure out that riding on the sand is not the best idea!Leave a Comment